Scripture tells us as Christ-followers that we are to "bear one-another's burdens." This directive once again took on powerful meaning for me this past week! Last Thursday, when I got in to the H2H office for the day, one of the first things I did was listen to the messages on the H2H voice mail. The first message I heard was from a 9 year old client that I had worked with in the past begging me to call them back. They told me that they had just learned that their dad had died early that morning and they NEEDED to talk with me.
Of course I immediately returned that call. When that young one got on the phone, I could hear the pain and distress in their voice. At that moment, I physically felt the burden of their pain come on me. My heart felt SO heavy and it was all I could do to not cry right along with them. I simply did not have anything to say but "I am so very sorry!" They then started telling me their story of what had happened, how they found out, how they were feeling right then, and wanted to come to see me again sometime soon.
At the end of our conversation, I assured them that when they were ready to come visit with me, I would be available for them. I asked if I could pray for them and their family on the phone, and they said they would like that. I then proceeded to pray for God's comfort and peace to be with them all. At the end of our prayer time, this young one expressed appreciation for my prayer and said that it helped them to feel a little better right then.
This situation is just one of many times that I have experienced someone else's burden coming onto my heart. This is exactly what scripture calls us to do as believers. I want to encourage all Christ-followers to be open to bearing one-another's burdens. It is a very powerful, emotionally intense experience that is packed with blessings for everyone involved.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
A Word of Thanks
The other day I had something very special happen to me. The mother of one of my very first H2H clients stopped by our office. It was about 10 years ago that I worked with the family. She said that she was in the area and wanted to stop by to say "thank you" for the work that I had done with her daughter who was 5 at the time.
She showed me a picture of her beautiful 15 year old daughter, who is now in high school and doing wonderful. Seeing this beautiful young lady brought tears to my eyes. She certainly is not that same scared little girl that I knew so many years ago!
The mom said that she guessed that our (counselors) job is probably a thankless job, receiving very little appreciation for what we do. She wanted to be sure that I knew how very much she and her husband appreciate, even 10 years later, the support they received through H2H back then.
I shared this experience with another H2H counselor and her comment to me was that, most likely, not even we realize the impact that we have on the lives of our clients. What a joy, privilege and responsibility we have when we get involved in the lives of hurting people.
This highlights the importance and again, responsibility that a counselor has; it is not something to be taken lightly! Praise God for working in the lives of His hurting people through the counseling ministry at H2H! He deserves and will get the glory for it all.
She showed me a picture of her beautiful 15 year old daughter, who is now in high school and doing wonderful. Seeing this beautiful young lady brought tears to my eyes. She certainly is not that same scared little girl that I knew so many years ago!
The mom said that she guessed that our (counselors) job is probably a thankless job, receiving very little appreciation for what we do. She wanted to be sure that I knew how very much she and her husband appreciate, even 10 years later, the support they received through H2H back then.
I shared this experience with another H2H counselor and her comment to me was that, most likely, not even we realize the impact that we have on the lives of our clients. What a joy, privilege and responsibility we have when we get involved in the lives of hurting people.
This highlights the importance and again, responsibility that a counselor has; it is not something to be taken lightly! Praise God for working in the lives of His hurting people through the counseling ministry at H2H! He deserves and will get the glory for it all.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Growing Deeper & Deeper in Love
Have you ever taken the time to consider your love relationship with God, comparing the love you have for Him today with the love you had with Him the first day that you entered into relationship with Him. My devotions today challenged me to do just that, to make the comparison.
As I thought back to the very beginning of my relationship with God, some 33 years ago, I remember feeling very emotional, giddy, excited, energetic, wanting to tell the world about this new relationship. It was very fresh and exciting, filled with wonder and awe, much like the early years of relationship with my husband. I had no idea that my love could/would be any deeper than it was in those early days.
As the years have passed, some of the feelings are the same, but some are very different. Today as I think about my relationship with God I am no longer "giddy" and not nearly so emotional; I am not what I would call "energetic" in my love any more. At first glance, this relationship appears to have lost its sparkle and vitality, and seems to be somewhat bland.
My love relationship with God today has some very different qualities about it that have developed over time. Today, my love has very deep, strong roots giving it stability and strength. I have a quiet assurance/confidence that our (God's and my) love will be able to weather any storm that life throws my way. I have a deep inner peace in this relationship that was not present in the early days. I have grown into this peace as I have experienced God's love and involvement in my life over the years and we have walked through many life storms.
My passion for God is lived out very differently than in those early days. At first glance, some might say that I have lost my passion for God but I believe that my love for God is deeper now than it ever has been. Just like my love for my husband is deeper today than it was on the day we were married. My prayer for every believer is that we all can honestly say that our love for God is deeper today than even on the day that we claimed Him as our own personal Lord and Savior. In this, time is our "friend"! God Bless!
As I thought back to the very beginning of my relationship with God, some 33 years ago, I remember feeling very emotional, giddy, excited, energetic, wanting to tell the world about this new relationship. It was very fresh and exciting, filled with wonder and awe, much like the early years of relationship with my husband. I had no idea that my love could/would be any deeper than it was in those early days.
As the years have passed, some of the feelings are the same, but some are very different. Today as I think about my relationship with God I am no longer "giddy" and not nearly so emotional; I am not what I would call "energetic" in my love any more. At first glance, this relationship appears to have lost its sparkle and vitality, and seems to be somewhat bland.
My love relationship with God today has some very different qualities about it that have developed over time. Today, my love has very deep, strong roots giving it stability and strength. I have a quiet assurance/confidence that our (God's and my) love will be able to weather any storm that life throws my way. I have a deep inner peace in this relationship that was not present in the early days. I have grown into this peace as I have experienced God's love and involvement in my life over the years and we have walked through many life storms.
My passion for God is lived out very differently than in those early days. At first glance, some might say that I have lost my passion for God but I believe that my love for God is deeper now than it ever has been. Just like my love for my husband is deeper today than it was on the day we were married. My prayer for every believer is that we all can honestly say that our love for God is deeper today than even on the day that we claimed Him as our own personal Lord and Savior. In this, time is our "friend"! God Bless!
Thursday, September 9, 2010
A Faith Adventure
H2H recently celebrated 10 years of ministry. What an amazing ride this has been watching God FAITHFULLY provide for His work at H2H! We had an anniversary celebration event, that historically has been a fundraising effort. This year, because of the anniversary, we decided to forgo the fundraising focus and focus on celebrating God and His work in and through H2H.
This decision was kind of a scary one because H2H's financial situation was very critical and was at an all-time low. But, we simply wanted to honor God and to trust Him to provide in other ways apart from this event. Just a few short days after this decision was made, God began blessing us with significant financial gifts.
I am keeping a journal right now and I want to share some of the recent entries to show you how I have been experiencing God moving in my heart and in H2H. Please sit back and enjoy the ride.
July 9th: "Often times it is a heavy burden I carry leading H2H. Today's scripture, 2 Kings 2:9 reminds me that H2H is God's work and He will/is providing for it! Even if I were not here, God would provide new leadership that would be better than me. I don't need to worry about H2H's future, God has it all taken care of and even now is preparing the next "generation" of leadership for H2H. I trust (confident assurance) that H2H will continue to grow stronger and stronger as the years pass by. NOT because of me, but because of God's divine plan!"
August 5th: "Today I acknowledge out loud that God is and will be faithful to His promises to me personally. I don't know in what form the fulfillment of His promises will come, I just know they will come. When all else fails, I choose to stand on what I KNOW to be true. . . .God will keep His promises. " (Little did I know that God would bless H2H ththis very day!)
This decision was kind of a scary one because H2H's financial situation was very critical and was at an all-time low. But, we simply wanted to honor God and to trust Him to provide in other ways apart from this event. Just a few short days after this decision was made, God began blessing us with significant financial gifts.
I am keeping a journal right now and I want to share some of the recent entries to show you how I have been experiencing God moving in my heart and in H2H. Please sit back and enjoy the ride.
July 9th: "Often times it is a heavy burden I carry leading H2H. Today's scripture, 2 Kings 2:9 reminds me that H2H is God's work and He will/is providing for it! Even if I were not here, God would provide new leadership that would be better than me. I don't need to worry about H2H's future, God has it all taken care of and even now is preparing the next "generation" of leadership for H2H. I trust (confident assurance) that H2H will continue to grow stronger and stronger as the years pass by. NOT because of me, but because of God's divine plan!"
August 5th: "Today I acknowledge out loud that God is and will be faithful to His promises to me personally. I don't know in what form the fulfillment of His promises will come, I just know they will come. When all else fails, I choose to stand on what I KNOW to be true. . . .God will keep His promises. " (Little did I know that God would bless H2H ththis very day!)
August 6th: "Yesterday God rained down blessings on H2H! Praise God! Thank You God! We received over $2,800 from a local church! It was so very unexpected. It is purely God moving and showing His faithfulness to me, His child, and to H2H, His ministry. I wish there were words to express how very loved by God I feel right now, but there aren't. I want to thank God for this wonderful blessing and to thank the church for being sensitive to God's leading! Thank You God!"
On August 28th, we had the anniversary celebration and it was a wonderful success! Approximately 100 people attended and we were very blessed that night!
September 9th: "H2H received a significant gift from an area church. I believe that this and several other gifts have come because of our recent 10 year anniversary celebration. Historically this event has been a fundraising effort but this year we were led to forgo the fundraising focus and simple praise the Lord for His goodness and blessing over the past 10 years. We received financial blessing during that event and the blessings still keep coming! This is so meaningful especially since H2H was struggling financially all summer. God's timing is perfect and I thank Him and Praise Him for it!"
I want to share these portions of my journal with you so that you can witness through me how God has been working in my heart and in and through H2H. My faith adventure is just that. . . an adventure full of fun, excitement, wonder, anxious times, drama and surprises all wrapped up in one big package. God is the most beautiful "ribbon and bow" decorating the package, holding it all together and making it ever so beautiful.
Over and over again, God just continues to demonstrate His love for me, for His ministry we call H2H, and for the people we serve through H2H. Praise God!
Friday, September 3, 2010
Slow, But Learning!
I was reminded by a client recently that learning, even very slow learning, is still learning! In my counseling ministry I always challenge growth and hope to see big growth quickly so that the person starts feeling better fast. But. . . .quickly is not always how God works His plans out.
I have been working with this person for approximately 6 months now and it feels like we talk about the same things over and over again at each session. Recently this person told me that they (and others) are beginning to see change in their life because they are continually remembering the things we have been talking about and the challenges to change attitudes and behaviors I have been giving them. They are making conscious efforts to make those changes. They are feeling encouraged by their own growth, even if it is very slow. Praise the Lord for this growth!
I also very recently had the opportunity to teach a God principle to one of my kids. They were very open to receive the teaching and indicated that they understood the principle. I long to see growth in my child in this area. It may not be manifested on the outside for a while, but I have confidence that the lesson will be resounding on the inside. I prefer to have growth taking place on the inside where the roots will grow deep, and patiently wait for the evidence of the growth on the outside.
Much like the parable of the sower in the Bible, this client and my child both have fertile soil where the roots are growing deep. I know in my heart that there will be a wonderful harvest in these two individuals in God's perfect time. I simply want them to take the time to experience life-long, deep, lasting growth and change, not simply a quick fix for a short time.
I pray that God will watch over them, protect them, and nurture them as they each grow into a solid faith-walk with Him!
I have been working with this person for approximately 6 months now and it feels like we talk about the same things over and over again at each session. Recently this person told me that they (and others) are beginning to see change in their life because they are continually remembering the things we have been talking about and the challenges to change attitudes and behaviors I have been giving them. They are making conscious efforts to make those changes. They are feeling encouraged by their own growth, even if it is very slow. Praise the Lord for this growth!
I also very recently had the opportunity to teach a God principle to one of my kids. They were very open to receive the teaching and indicated that they understood the principle. I long to see growth in my child in this area. It may not be manifested on the outside for a while, but I have confidence that the lesson will be resounding on the inside. I prefer to have growth taking place on the inside where the roots will grow deep, and patiently wait for the evidence of the growth on the outside.
Much like the parable of the sower in the Bible, this client and my child both have fertile soil where the roots are growing deep. I know in my heart that there will be a wonderful harvest in these two individuals in God's perfect time. I simply want them to take the time to experience life-long, deep, lasting growth and change, not simply a quick fix for a short time.
I pray that God will watch over them, protect them, and nurture them as they each grow into a solid faith-walk with Him!
Friday, August 20, 2010
Honor thy father and mother
As a counselor, I have often been challenged to understand the meaning of God's command in Exodus 20:12, "Honor thy father and mother." Over the course of my career, I have worked with very dysfunctional families, abusive (emotionally, physically, sexually, even spiritually) parents, and also the children (adults and youth) of abusive parents. In these families there have been deep wounds inflicted, sometimes by accident, sometimes by intent.
For those who have received deep wounds from their parents, the following question often arises, "How can I and why should I honor my parents who have hurt me so deeply?" The greater question is, "How can I honor those people who have hurt me without saying that what they did was ok?" These are valid questions that need to be answered, and in order to do so, we need to understand exactly what God means by "honor".
Many times throughout scripture we are commanded to love our enemy and in abusive situations, the abuser is seen as the enemy. The next question is "how can I 'love' my enemy, the person(s) who hurt me so deeply, and not hold them accountable for what they have done to me?"
1 Corinthians 13 explains how we are to love even our enemies. The love described here is not an emotional, "mushy", romantic kind of love, but a respectful, honoring kind of love. This passage tells us to be patient, and kind, which has nothing to do with emotions or feelings; we are not to be envious, or boastful, rude, self-seeking or easily angered, again having nothing to do with feelings; we are to keep no record of wrongs. We are not to delight in evil, even when we think the other person deserves what they get.
Given all of this information, how are we to honor our parents, even those who have inflicted great wounds? We simply live out 1 Corinthians 13. We show respect, which has nothing to do with how others treat us, but everything to do with how we choose to treat others.
No parent does everything right and some do many things terribly wrong. No matter which experience we have had with our parents, good or bad, we are commanded by God to love and honor our parents. We cannot change the past, what is done is done, but we can change the future by how we respond in the present. As believers, we live out God's command by being kind, patient and respectful in every way to everyone we come in contact with, including those who have hurt us, because our behavior is a reflection of who we are in Christ, not who the other person is or what they have done to us.
I pray that we will diligently look for ways to honor our parents and in so doing, we will honor God, our Heavenly Father.
For those who have received deep wounds from their parents, the following question often arises, "How can I and why should I honor my parents who have hurt me so deeply?" The greater question is, "How can I honor those people who have hurt me without saying that what they did was ok?" These are valid questions that need to be answered, and in order to do so, we need to understand exactly what God means by "honor".
Many times throughout scripture we are commanded to love our enemy and in abusive situations, the abuser is seen as the enemy. The next question is "how can I 'love' my enemy, the person(s) who hurt me so deeply, and not hold them accountable for what they have done to me?"
1 Corinthians 13 explains how we are to love even our enemies. The love described here is not an emotional, "mushy", romantic kind of love, but a respectful, honoring kind of love. This passage tells us to be patient, and kind, which has nothing to do with emotions or feelings; we are not to be envious, or boastful, rude, self-seeking or easily angered, again having nothing to do with feelings; we are to keep no record of wrongs. We are not to delight in evil, even when we think the other person deserves what they get.
Given all of this information, how are we to honor our parents, even those who have inflicted great wounds? We simply live out 1 Corinthians 13. We show respect, which has nothing to do with how others treat us, but everything to do with how we choose to treat others.
No parent does everything right and some do many things terribly wrong. No matter which experience we have had with our parents, good or bad, we are commanded by God to love and honor our parents. We cannot change the past, what is done is done, but we can change the future by how we respond in the present. As believers, we live out God's command by being kind, patient and respectful in every way to everyone we come in contact with, including those who have hurt us, because our behavior is a reflection of who we are in Christ, not who the other person is or what they have done to us.
I pray that we will diligently look for ways to honor our parents and in so doing, we will honor God, our Heavenly Father.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Seasons of Parenting - Part II
I had a very interesting,yet startling conversation with my young adult daughter the other day. She had called to talk about some major decisions that she was needing to make and wanted to process with me and seek my counsel.
She now has a very special someone in her life and they are discussing long-term commitments to one another. After she shared with me some new opportunities opening up for her, I asked her if she had talked to her special someone about all of this. She said it had not occurred to her to discuss these things with him. She has become so accustomed to talking with dear 'ol mom and needing to make decisions on her own that it never crossed her mind to her to get his input on these things too.
I reminded her that, of course she is ALWAYS welcome to talk with me about whatever is on her heart, because this young man is filling a very important role in her life now too, it will be important to include him in these life decisions. I encouraged her to seek his counsel and to place value on what he thinks, consider his thoughts/feelings and her own as she makes her decisions. The final decision is hers to make, but seeking wise, Godly counsel from important people in her life is always a right thing to do.
The final thought that I left her with was that, now that this young man is very seriously in her life, it will be important for her to value his opinion even more than mine because these life decisions have great potential to impact their relationship very profoundly, I am simply a bystander and our relationship (my daughter's and mine) will remain the same no matter what the final outcome is.
When these words came out of my mouth, I questioned what I had just done. . . .redirected my daughter to someone else before me! It did not feel good, but it felt very right. Even though my daughter is not engaged or married yet, I was being led by the spirit to begin teaching my daughter how to be a Godly wife, seeking her husband's counsel even before her mother's. Scripture tells us in Genesis 2:24-25 that "For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." This leaving the parents applies to the woman as well.
As a counselor, I cannot tell you the number of couples that I have counseled that had very difficult marital issues stemming from one or the other spouse being connected with their mother in unhealthy ways, putting the mother before even their spouse.
I love my daughter very much and I long to be there for her always, but there will soon come a time when her husband will take precedence over me, and that is as it should be. I have confidence that no one will ever be able to take my place in her life, and I must be willing to surrender my #2 position to her husband as God ordained.
I know that she is in good hands, those of her Heavenly Father and those of her special someone. Just as she is making room for him in her life, I am choosing to make room for him in mine as well. I pray for God's richest blessings on their budding relationship and am asking God to help them establish a healthy, loving relationship for God first, then one another, then for mom and dad and everyone else.
This is yet another season in my life as a parent. It is exciting, yet somewhat painful to see my blessed children growing up, finding their life partners, and starting to have their own families. I am learning my new role in their lives and am nestling in. Life is good!
She now has a very special someone in her life and they are discussing long-term commitments to one another. After she shared with me some new opportunities opening up for her, I asked her if she had talked to her special someone about all of this. She said it had not occurred to her to discuss these things with him. She has become so accustomed to talking with dear 'ol mom and needing to make decisions on her own that it never crossed her mind to her to get his input on these things too.
I reminded her that, of course she is ALWAYS welcome to talk with me about whatever is on her heart, because this young man is filling a very important role in her life now too, it will be important to include him in these life decisions. I encouraged her to seek his counsel and to place value on what he thinks, consider his thoughts/feelings and her own as she makes her decisions. The final decision is hers to make, but seeking wise, Godly counsel from important people in her life is always a right thing to do.
The final thought that I left her with was that, now that this young man is very seriously in her life, it will be important for her to value his opinion even more than mine because these life decisions have great potential to impact their relationship very profoundly, I am simply a bystander and our relationship (my daughter's and mine) will remain the same no matter what the final outcome is.
When these words came out of my mouth, I questioned what I had just done. . . .redirected my daughter to someone else before me! It did not feel good, but it felt very right. Even though my daughter is not engaged or married yet, I was being led by the spirit to begin teaching my daughter how to be a Godly wife, seeking her husband's counsel even before her mother's. Scripture tells us in Genesis 2:24-25 that "For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." This leaving the parents applies to the woman as well.
As a counselor, I cannot tell you the number of couples that I have counseled that had very difficult marital issues stemming from one or the other spouse being connected with their mother in unhealthy ways, putting the mother before even their spouse.
I love my daughter very much and I long to be there for her always, but there will soon come a time when her husband will take precedence over me, and that is as it should be. I have confidence that no one will ever be able to take my place in her life, and I must be willing to surrender my #2 position to her husband as God ordained.
I know that she is in good hands, those of her Heavenly Father and those of her special someone. Just as she is making room for him in her life, I am choosing to make room for him in mine as well. I pray for God's richest blessings on their budding relationship and am asking God to help them establish a healthy, loving relationship for God first, then one another, then for mom and dad and everyone else.
This is yet another season in my life as a parent. It is exciting, yet somewhat painful to see my blessed children growing up, finding their life partners, and starting to have their own families. I am learning my new role in their lives and am nestling in. Life is good!
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